Archive for the Issues Category

Welcome back

Posted in Issues, Poetry, Text, Writing on September 4, 2007 by geniusadvice

uwb

Pet Peeve

Posted in Issues, Text on April 16, 2007 by geniusadvice

You all know I like text, right?
Well now you know.
And for the longest while, I’ve been angry at a friend for posting up, what I thought, was the most ridiculous font that was only unreadable to me, it seemed.

What I see.

Well, apparently, I found out much later that there is nothing actually wrong with the font and it’s because my Mozilla Firefox text size is set to a certain size of font and after it shrinks to a certain, only this font clumps up. (To toggle zoom, Ctrl – + or -.)

What I should see.

See, you do learn something new everyday.
EARWIGS HAVE WINGS. See?

(Pictures pulled off random Xanga page. Don’t sue.)

Eight Eating Etiquettes with Asians.

Posted in Culture, Family, Food, Humor, Issues, Life on February 26, 2007 by geniusadvice

I’m still in the CNY mode, so here goes. (By Asian, I mean Chinese. Sorry, South Asians!) Hopefully the advice belows makes you on good terms with Asians relating to their culture through dining. Especially if you’re meeting your hot Asian girlfriend’s parents for the first time and they’re not white-washed. For all the points below, assume you are eating at a Chinese restaurant, and you are the minority there. That means NOT Asian, buddy.

1.
Arrive on time. Needless to say, Asians are vey judgemental while not on the outside. Being late will only label you as a slob. And that’s minus 2 brownie points.

2.
If it’s a special occasion (ie. birthdays, Chinese New Years), bring a gift. Like oranges, because…that’s how Asians are (for lack of a better explanation). For Chinese New Years, I think the unspoken rule is that married folks need to give children money in red pockets.

When you are excepting gifts, it is custom to refuse it first, preferably 3 times. If the giver doesn’t not seem to want to insist 3 times, once is fine. As long as you look reluctant to receive it.

3.
Pour the tea for everybody. This is only polite, and you should do this especially for elderly people or people generally older than you. Do not order or water Coke, as that will make it seem like you are not trying to get to know your guests. Love the tea, and pretend you’re drinking coffee instead.

4.
Learn how to use chopsticks in advanced.
This will impress Asians a lot. Forks are a no-no.

5.
Answer the interrogation questions during mealtime. This is like an interview and if they don’t like you, you’re pretty much screwed. Make you job sound glorious, even if you’re a programmer. (No offence). Don’t say how you enjoy making out with the parents’ daughter or anything stupid like that. You might get…um…injured very badly.

6.
Research some Asian dishes you can order in advanced. You won’t be getting any French fries. Don’t order Western food in a Chinese restaurant. There’s a reason for that.

7.
Dress decent. Don’t overdress, but dress ‘decent’.

8.
Paying for the bill. I don’t know if only Asians can do this, but you must seem that you really want to pay for the meal to the extent of fighting for your right to pay. Yes, this seems ridiculous, but I assure you that this is not some Asian conspiracy to scam you for a free meal. Seriously.

And that’s it.
Don’t hold me responsible if anything back fires.
Because I’ll delete this site faster than you can say “Nee ho maa??”

Palindrome: Smut

Posted in Fiction, Issues, Life, school, Writing on February 20, 2007 by geniusadvice

She’s so pitiful. Look at the tear-stained face. Does she have no idea she’s making a fool out of herself? I knew I hated her the moment I saw her on the first day of school. It was just bad luck I had to endure all my classes with her; I would have to say it was torture. And now, the last year, the year of all highschool years, the graduating class. She was one of the popular” kids, of course. I’ve seen them, what they do behind her back. The snickers and the “she did this and that…” Even then, I felt no shame in spreading those online rumors. About how she made out with all the guys (or at least the desirable ones) in the boy’s restroom. And how she was such a slut.

She’s such a slut, how she made out with all the desirable guys in the boy’s restroom. I felt no shame spreading the online rumors, then. The snickers and the “she did this and that…” they do behind her back, I’ve seen them. She was one of the popular kids. And now, the graduating class, the highschool year of years, the last year; it would be torture. It was just bad luck I had to endure all my classes with her. On the first day of school, I knew she was hated the moment I saw her. Does she have no idea she’s making a fool out of herself? The face with the tear-stained look. She’s so pitiful.